General courtship theory for girls – Part 1 of 2

Since I wrote a general courtship theory for guys on this blog, I feel it's fair for me to post a general courtship strategy for girls.  The new book from Neil Strauss won't arrive for another three days so I might as well talk about something else for the time being.

Girls usually fail in courtship for three reasons:

#1 - Too much confidence
When a girl has too much confidence, she becomes overly picky.  It's OK to be overly picky if she has the beauty to match.  Often, she does not.

#2 - Too little confidence
When a girl has too little confidence, she becomes shy, withdrawn or hostile to guys.  She will only react to a guy, not initiate.  She may also act mean to get a guy's attention since acting mean involves less risk for rejection than acting nice.

#3 - Believes in fairy tales
When a girl believes in fairy tales, she expects love to come as portrayed in movies and Korean dramas.

These three scenarios are very different.  Yet, there is commonality: girls in these scenarios think they don't have to take action and believe love will "just happen".  Add to this their belief in fate, astrology and other superstition, and you’d arrive at the perfect excuse for inaction.

Before you (as a female) want results, you must believe that your courtship success depends directly on your ability to play the game and take risk.  This is not just for courtship, it's for almost everything you do in life.  You will not succeed at school, at work, in business, in politics, in whatever, if you think you can just sit lazily on your rectum waiting for your lottery numbers to hit.

Once you understand this concept, and accept it, you need to work on your appearance.

Unfortunately, a girl's appearance is a make-or-break issue.  You need to work on it.  Lose the weight, dress flashy and flirty and have a killer haircut.

Of course, not all girls will be a perfect 10.  And that's OK.  Most guys understand his own value before imposing standards.  A "hot" guy with money and social skills will naturally demand higher standards than a guy who's lower on the totem pole.

Whether his standards are high or low, you must meet them or be borderline.  If you fall short, it's game over for you.  Not to be mean, but he's not going to somehow see "the real you" if he's unimpressed with the physical you.

Knowing whether you meet his standards (being "in the game") is not hard.  Guys tend to make their intentions pretty clear, especially if he knows you’re single and available.  If he makes constant and persistent attempts to talk to you or be around you, there's a good chance you're in the game.  Don’t erect stupid obstacles by playing hard-to-get or being mean or implying you have a boyfriend.  If you do, you will find it infinitely harder to determine whether he finds you physically acceptable.

If you’re still unsure, you need to probe by taking initiative.  Make an approach or try being a bit touchy.  Do it two or three times.  If he doesn't respond or, after a short period of time, he doesn’t reciprocate, accept the fact that it's game over.  Don’t take it personally.  Maybe he has a girlfriend, or isn’t interested in dating, or is gay.  Even if he’s not impressed with your appearance, someone else will since beauty is subjective.  I doubt you’re so unattractive that NO ONE would find you acceptable.

If you're "in the game", the next blog entry will talk about where to go from here...